Honour Thy Father and Thy Mother

I have been absent for a long while now.   This morning, I sat myself down  and quickly pen this down to share my thoughts and feelings with you before I do my other chores.

I love watching CSI’s series. 

Today, a scene in CSI NY  (sorry turned the episode on halfway so did not know the title),  was about one of the CSI staff visiting his aged father in a home.  He wanted his father to remember how abusive he was towards him and kept pushing his father to remember.  He wanted his father to apologise to him and feel  the guilt.  He wanted his father to feel his own anger  of being an abused son.  Unfortunately, his aged father cannot remember.  He was so angry and hurt that his father cannot feel what he wanted him to feel.

Towards the end of the series, his superior spoke with him.  He shared to his superior  how much he wanted his father to feel his pain of being an abused son.  Throughout the conversation with his superior,  what he really wanted was to have his father back; the moment as a young boy whom his dad would take him to the record store to buy records.   He wanted to hurt his father but yet wanted to forgive him but couldn’t.  He wanted to release the pain he was carrying.  His superior said this “you wanted to remember him as a good dad.  You carrying the baggage will make it harder for you to accept him. He is also a victim.”

In the last scene, he reminisces his happy days by sharing a record he loved (his father’s collection with his girlfriend who told him that she is there to journey with him.

I enjoy CSI for many reasons.  There are so many lessons one can learn.  I love lessons like what I have watched today.

My own aged father can be annoying because of his stubbornness.  He argues with all of us even when he cannot remember that he did something but denied it.  He was not always there for me growing up and in certain ways, I felt what that actor felt in the moment.  It is  true for me, that I wish I had the father who would dote on me when I was 4 years old.  He would take me around on his bike and spend so much time with me when he could.  He was not abusive but avoid confrontation when there was any at home. 

On the other hand, I see him a fragile man getting older by the day and living his 2nd childhood except that physically he is an adult.  I am thankful today, I am reminded that my father was also a victim of circumstances and he did his best he knew how then.  He was who he was.

I am thankful he is still around and able to be with me and for me to care for  him together with my aged mum too.  I will do my best to provide and care for them with God’s grace. Yes, I have to sacrifice certain freedom and also postpone things I want to do for myself.  I know God has better plans for me and I trust Him to live my life.

4th Commandment –  Honour your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the LORD your God is giving you.

— Exodus 20:12 




In his CREED for OPTIMIST, Christian D. Larsen tell you how you can become somebody!


Be STRONG that nothing can disturb your PEACE of MIND.


Make ALL your FRIENDS feel there is SOMETHING SPECIAL in them.



THINK only of the BEST, WORK only for the BEST and EXPECT only the BEST.

Be as ENTHUSIASTIC about the SUCCESS of others as you are about your own.

FORGET the mistakes of the past and PRESS on to the GREATER ACHIEVEMENTS of the FUTURE.  


Spend so much time IMPROVING YOURSELF that you have no time left to criticize others.

Be too big for worry and too NOBLE for anger.




Are you aware of your senses?

I used to complain a lot about my physical disability and asked God why He cursed me.  Deep within I was always searching for the answer to my ‘curse’.  I refused to accept there were other people worse off than me.

Today, I am still awed and amazed how this woman in her time, overcame her disabilites and made it to leave such legacy till today. Without the current techonolgy advancement, she made it through and prove that it was and is possible to live amazing lives.

A real woman of substance.

A rebellious child lost in darkness but she became a woman who gave light and hope to the world.   Are we living in the dark literally, or do we see light without our eyes?


Have you tried closing your eyes smelling, listening, touching and seeing with your heart.



Please comment and share your thoughts of this video. I would love to hear and learn from you.


“Once I knew only darkness and stillness….my life was without past or future…..   but a little word from the fingers of another fell into my hand that clutched at emptiness, and my heart leaped to the rapture of living.”  –  Helen Keller.


This poem was written during my darkest hours of my adult life.  
It helped me relieve some of my pain and in a form of a prayer for help.  
 dark pit 001                         (Art by Nicole Chan)

 Dalam kebingungan, aku mencari ilham

Semua yang indah tidak kupendam

Hati yang duka selalu bertanya

Bilakan bahagia akan menjelma


Ku sentiasa berasa duka

Dalam dunia yang penuh pancaroba

Alangkah indah jika duka tiada

Hidup bahagia, ketawa senantiasa


Akan tetapi bahagia ada padaku

Ia terbenam dalam jiwaku

Bolehku capai jika ada kemahuan

Pasti kebahagiaan akan ku tawan


Kepercayaan diri mesti ku hargai

Dalam dunia yang penuh misteri

Kefahaman hidup perlu ku pelajari

Segala kepahitan pasti di atasi

 Percayalah diri, kuatkan iman

Sentiasa bertakwah hidup pun aman

Segala yang ada kita serahkan

Kepada Tuhan kita amanahkan


 (Written by Catherine Lim 1992)

Ten Things that will Change how you look at Life!

THAT’S RIGHT!    Ten Things that will probably change how you look at Life!


1. You are a gift to the world

You were created for a reason. No matter what the circumstance. You are here for a purpose and to make a positive difference here on earth.

2. You are unique

Most definitely. There is no another you even if you have a twin. We are all unique individuals and so are your fingerprints! So be proud of who you are. There’s only one YOU!

3. Your life can be what you want it to be

Our attitude towards our life make a whole lot of difference. You can shape your life, of course, with some influence from around us. However, at the end of the day, it is still our choice how we want it to be.

4. Take one day at a time

It can be tough if we have the whole world on our shoulder. Let tomorrow worry itself. Just enjoy today and finish what you need to do today. Live today. Love today. If today’s task has somewhat ‘failed’, start again tomorrow. Be conscious about each day and cherish it.

5. Count your blessings, not your troubles

Whether the glass half full or half empty, you decide. If we can be sad, we can also be happy. I believe being happy is a better deal and it minimizes our stress level. Be thankful and be grateful, even for the troubles. Troubles teaches you to be wiser and become a better person.


6. You’ll make it through whatever comes along

“Tough times never last, tough people do.” That is the truth. Like the tree, stand tall and stand proud amidst storm, and the scorching sun.

7. You have the answer within you.

The solution to every problem is within us. We just need to find it. Spend some time in solitude and reflect. Most of the time, we can find the answers we need through situations, people and even nature. Believe in yourself.

8. Have courage

Have the courage to try new things. Face every trials in the face with a smile and enthusiasm. There will always be support. Just have to ask.

9. Be strong

Keep pushing forward and keep moving no matter how hard the road ahead of you. When you have to stop, breathe and gain the strength to move again. It is when you decide to be strong in the storm, can you sail through it.

10. Dare to dream

Dreams are free. No matter how funny or silly it may seem, dream it. Anything is possible.  If people laugh at your dreams, well at least you made them happy.


Continue to dream those dreams others consider to be silly.

Know you are very special in the sight of God.

There is ALWAYS a way out of any situation in life!

– Catherine Lim

Lesson in Tenderness

Standfirst: There is much that we can learn from Nature if we keep our eyes peeled.

IT WAS time for dinner and my sister and I took a drive out and headed to our regular coffee shop. We parked across the street. The road was especially busy at that hour of the day, so we waited patiently at the kerb for the coast to clear before crossing. Above the din of the traffic, a loud and stern meowing of a cat caught my attention. I looked to my left and saw what to me was a most interesting and thought-provoking scene.

catA mother cat was coaxing her kitten to come out from under a car. She was calling her baby and using body language to tell her baby that they should cross to the other side. But the little kitten just meowed and stepped back in fear. The mother continued to coax her baby and after two minutes or so, she ran across to the other side of the road the moment the traffic was clear. Perched on the kerb, the mother cat continued meowing, calling her baby to follow suit.

The kitten crept out from under the car timidly and let out a distress call to tell its mother not to leave it alone on the other side of the road. The mother continued to call on her kitten and after a minute or so, the mother ran back to her kitten. This time, her meows were firm and slightly high-pitched. She continued to coax the kitten to cross, and then she left the kitten again and ran across the road.

By now, the kitten had came out from under the car and was in full view. I decided to step in and gently told the kitten that I was going to pick it up and take it to its mummy. The mother was eyeing me closely throughout the whole episode. I carried the kitten which was trembling in fear and crossed the road and took it to its mother. The cat did not move or run as most cats would when approached. She looked at me and kept meowing. I set the kitten down to its mummy and the baby was so happy to be reunited with its mother. It rubbed its head against the mother’s body.

Mother and baby purred softly as they headed towards an alley and disappeared from view. I was touched by this simple gesture of love that the mother cat had for its kitten. She risked her life by crossing the busy road not once, but twice, just to coax her kitten to follow her. The mother cat had demonstrated so much love, patience and persistence as she tried to teach her kitten through example.

I reflected on my relationship with my own mother. We had exchanged many harsh words and had our share of arguments. That was our communication style. As a child, I remember feeling jealous whenever I see my neighbours’ kids being hugged and showered with compliments. I envied them when their parents announced how proud they were of their kids’ achievements. My parents never once complimented me in front of their friends. Open displays of affection were for westerners, they believed. Little did they understand that children hunger for approval and affirmation. A word of comfort, a kiss or even a hug means a lot to young, impressionable minds.

I learnt later in life that my parents grew up in a culture in which open displays of affection were something alien. They were not demonstrative of their love for me because they did not know how to show affection openly. I love them still and appreciate them for doing their best as parents, given the limitations. Life provides neverending lessons for us. Nature is a wonderful teacher. Each day, I look around me and find invaluble lessons in little nooks and crannies. I related them to my life and that helps me to learn to be a better person.

Even animals can teach us a lesson or two. Like the protective mother cat and her helpless kitten. I thank this feline family for reminding me of the unconditional love my parents have for me. Even though I have special needs and needed leg braces, my parents did not treat me any differently from my sister. They did not look upon me as someone less capable than my able-bodied sister. That instilled in me a quiet confidence which put me in good stead.

Today, as I gaze fondly at their lined faces and silver hair, I am so proud to have them as my parents. In their old age, they have grown more open with their affection. I can hug them, kiss them and tell them how much I love them. My father would blush but I know he is happy. Mother and I communicate so much better now and have become closer. I thank God for the opportunity to reconcile with them and mend the broken fences before it is too late.

Published on 15th March 2012 – “The Star”